The Why I Won't Have Kids Cheat Sheet

As you've already noticed (unless this is the first part of my page you clicked on), I am childfree and will remain that way my entire life. It may seem that I'm obsessed with the subject and defending my childfree status, but that is what happens when I'm constantly bombarded by questions, accusations, and pro-breeding propaganda. People ask me all the time (including people I don't know with NO RIGHT to ask me such personal questions) WHY I don't want kids. They usually don't actually WANT to know why I don't want kids...they just ask that and then proceed to tell me why I SHOULD want kids. It's very irritating. For those of you out there with kids, imagine if everywhere you went, you had to worry about someone approaching you and asking you why you'd had children and then telling you why you shouldn't have.
So anyway, I carry a card with me in my wallet that I call my "cheat-sheet" of reasons for being childfree. I've never had the guts to use it in this way, but it's theoretical purpose is that when someone demands to know why I won't have kids, I simply hand them the card.
(Side 1)
Me-Centered Reasons
2)Sleepless nights.
3)Terrible twos.
4)Terrible teens.
5)I might have a boy.
6)I can't afford one.
7)I don't want to be
saddled to a job I hate.
8)I like being able to
spend time alone with my wife.
9)I like going out to eat
10)I like quiet time
to read or think.
11)I don't like snot
or vomit.
12)I don't want to deal
with the heartache and
stress of wondering each
time she goes off to school,
"Is this the day she gets
shot by a classmate?"
(Side 2)
Reasons based on compassion
and consideration

1)I'm still trying to get my own life
in order; until I've done that, it
would be unfair to bring a child into it.
2)Until I've found a place where it's
physically and psychologically safe
to raise a child, I'm not going to
bring one into the word.
3)Until the thousands of children who
are already born and need food,
clothes, homes, parents, etc. are
taken care of, I'm not going
to bring another child into the world
just because I want one that
looks like me or has my genes.
4)Overpopulation threatens us all.
Rather than simply complaining about
traffic, overcrowded schools, rising
crime, or welfare moms, I'm doing my part
by not adding to the overflowing masses.
It's the best thing I can do
for ALL children.

Another thing that people say to me on this subject quite often, and something I think is incredibly rude and audacious, is "You'll change your mind". Invariably, it's someone who doesn't know me, and it strikes me as excedingly pompass to assume that just because THEY decided they want kids, I will. As if my twenty-some-odd years worth of experience and convictions are just going to be wiped away one day and I'll say "I think I'll breed now". You might say "hey...if you know you're sure, then why does it bother you?", and yes, I understand the "me thinks he doth protest too much" argument. But it's the sheer arrogance of the comment that irks me, not the idea that I might change my mind. Imagine if every time I met someone with children I told them "You'll change your mind and regret having kids eventually". It's the same thing.

For more of my thoughts on this issue, check out my rant on being childfree.
Back to my Homepage.